Birds are gross. And very stupid.

No, we didn’t get new pet sparrows. Ick.

Yesterday, Kyle was post call. This month, that means that one day he’s on call, and the next he might as well be because he’s just shy of dead when he comes home. I was having a particularly strong need to just veg, too, so I ordered pizza after putting the girls down and woke Kyle up to hang out for an hour or two before going (back) to bed.

The pizza man came, so I grabbed Thea and took her into the family room (she’s obnoxious otherwise). Kyle opened the door to pay, and – in an instant – there was a bird in my family room. Followed very closely by a second. The dog was going crazy, so I took her upstairs. Kyle finished paying and we began trying to get them out of our house. (We had shut all the doors upstairs, including the girls’ room, and just prayed they didn’t wake up!).

After opening all the doors and trying to shoo them out with a broom (VERY unsuccessfully), I called my dad. He just seems to be able to take care of these things! He said keep trying a few minutes, then he’d be over with a net or other (less child/family-friendly) method of removal 🙂

Kyle had the idea to hold up sheets/blankets, almost as “fake walls” to try and direct them out the door. We were out of options, and they mostly just kept flying back and forth between above-pictured perch in one corner to the top of the kitchen cabinets. Ew, ew, ew. Birds are so disgusting. Might I add, at this point, that we also had nasty grey feathers ALL OVER the two rooms. Ew.

The fake walls didn’t really work, but in a frenzy they flew toward the door to the garage. We propped it open, and continued our pursuit – hoping that if they weren’t smart enough to leave the house, we could at least trap them in the garage. That would be much easier to deal with!

Eventually, they did make it into the garage, but not before coming entirely too close (multiple times) to my face as I stood on a chair with my Wall. We shut them out of the house and opened the garage door, assuming they’d leave. We returned to our (then cold) food, to try and get some sustinance (it was about 9pm at this point) before tackling the mess. Ew.

We ate, spent who knows how long vacumming, sweeping, mopping, wiping down everything, etc. Miraculously, they didn’t poop anywhere. Still, with just the feathers and other …. junk that comes off of wild animals, it was certainly not the way we had planned to relax……

And after all of this, Kyle went out the back door, around to the garage, and – wouldn’t you know it – the stupid things are still just perched on the open garage door. Asleep.

Kyle opens and closes the door a few hundred times, whacks some more with the broom, starts the cars, etc. Only one bird ever leaves. What the heck?

Now, as I type, Kyle is going downstairs to see if the other stupid creature left when the sun came out this morning. We slept all night with the garage door open (brrrrr) in hopes that s/he would use it’s tiny little bird brain and get out of our house!

Some day this will be funny. It’s not yet, to us anyway, but I thought it might be for you 😉


  1. I can only imagine! We had a baby bird fly in while I was going to let the dogs out in SC. Thankfully the little thing wasn’t very good at flying so we were able to corner it in our dining room and sweep it out the front door. I believe that when Tank and Buckeye are having dog dreams they’re still chsing that bird 3 years later.

  2. We’ve had two BATS in our bedroom at two different times, the last time being last month when Ayed was in Riyad visiting his sister.
    What the heck to do when Ayed is gone??? Luckily, Sarah came to the rescue. This bat was weird because it was so tame compared to the other one that flew around the room nonstop. I feared it was ill with early rabies or bird flu or…but what to do? Sarah knocked it down from the curtain and then it just stayed under a chair so she got a towel, folded it up to be real thick in case it bit or something, then she basically scooped up the thing in the towel and threw it all out the window as one package. The next day Bootie went and got the towel, we washed it well, and still use it. 😉 Yeah, birds are real fun!

  3. Leah, that’s too funny! Thankfully Thea hardly even saw them before we put her out of the way. She went nuts after, though, while we were cleaning. She was on a mission since she smelled them (and saw (and ate!)) all the feathers, etc

    Wow, Kim! Tell Sarah I’m VERY impressed. I think bats would have made me more uncomfortable… especially, as you said, if it was acting weird. When the second bird wouldn’t leave (it finally did, the next day), I started wondering if something was wrong with it as well. What can you do, though? We cleaned up after them, that’s about it!